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GAY means happy SHOW

Rev. Fred Phelps has been protesting at military funerals becuase he believes American deaths in Iraq are divine punishment for a country that he says harbors homosexuals. 

Shirley Phelps-Roper, a daughter of Fred Phelps and an attorney for the Topeka, Kansas-based church, said neither state laws nor the Patriot Guard can silence their message that God killed the soldiers because they fought for a country that embraces homosexuals.

"The scriptures are crystal clear that when God sets out to punish a nation, it is with the sword. An IED is just a broken-up sword," Phelps-Roper said. "Since that is his weapon of choice, our forum of choice has got to be a dead soldier's funeral."

All I have to say is holy shit.  That's right HOLY shit.  Pun intended.  What the hell?  Does this make any sense whatsoever?  Piss on you Shirley Phelps-Roper and Rev. Fred Phelps.  How dare you invade people's funerals, it's a fucking funeral!  I love when people claim to speak in God's name or better yet Jesus' name.  Who the hell would want these nutcases speaking for them?  Certainly not God nor Jesus.  

Oh thank you wise Rev. Fred Phelps of the wonderous site godhatesfags.com.  I'm sure God does love people that spread hatred, and fat old white hetereo men the best.  And to prove that ignorance breeds ignorance you know have your daughter preaching hatred as well.  One thing is for sure, if there is a hell, you are both going to be preaching the gospel in it.

Soldiers are being killed in Iraq because of Gays in America?  Again I say: HOLY SHIT.  This has to be the most ridiculously stupid things I've ever heard, well except for the time someone told me to lick a Colorado River Toad for a fantastic trip (PS it didn't work).  

Read the whole article here.

GO BIKERS!!!  Hootie Hoo!

Why is it that I can find the one guy who will end up shitting on me, out of everyone?

So...  I'm going to host a show in Buffalo.  My friends come with me plus one guy that I like, who knows I like him.  We all get along great.   Early on I was afraid of what might happen... just because I was.  He knew I liked him but we aren't officially "dating."  So I was afraid of the worst, like he'd end up hooking up with someone.  Of course did I expect it to happen right in front of my face?  Nope.  Not only did he decided to be flirting with a guy WHILE I was performing... he proceeded to go into the bathroom with him, THEN from about 10 feet away, they went up to the bar, the guy sat on his lap and THEN they made out.  RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!  I would love to say I was surprised but quite honestly I was not.  Surprisingly I was very calm when I walked over and was like... ummm... what the fuck is going on?  I said, I know you obviously don't care but you really hurt me.  Then the dumbass boy he was making out with tried to introduce himself to me, to which I said: um how about you go fuck yourself.  They boy left the bar a few minutes later.  But seriously.  You go to a bar out of town with someone you KNOW likes you and you SAY you like them, only to be so blatantly... I want to say RUDE but that is an understatement... but its like oh my god, come on?  What the fuck.  I just don't get people.  This has to be one of the most offensive, rude and tasteless things that has ever happened to me and that's saying a lot.

All I can say is what I said before... go fuck yourself.

Wednesdays are a blast!  I'm still amzed at the great crowds we've been having (hopefully I don't jinx myself by saying this!)  If you haven't been out to see some of the crazy shit go down, check out my myspace page: 

PANDORA BOXX ROCKS!

School's back in session, but it's a lot less stressful than it was last semester.  Although, once my TV show goes into full swing it will get a little hectic.  Yes that's right :)  As an independent study I am producing my own half-hour variety/comedy show!  Hopefully it will eventually air on public access television here in Rochester.  I'll have more details as the project goes on.  I'm really excited! 

I have lots of things I'm excited about right now! 

So that's about it, not that I think anyone even reads this anymore...  I even forget I have a website. ha ha ha...

Very rarely do I leave a theatre and am completely speechless.  This was the case last night when I saw "Brokeback Mountain."    I wasn't sure what to expect because I had heard so many things and usually I don't like gay movies.  I just knew that if someone died of AIDS in this movie I was going to walk out, because does that have to be in every gay movie?  Thankfully that desn't happen but what did happen was just this beautiful and sad tale.  It was sad but it was a good sad, mostly.  It is an honest, true love story.  I know I have never seen a gay movie like this and I hope that it opens up the floodgates to more like this.  I had to hold back the tears in the theatre.  I just kept telling myself, get to the car, get to the car, you can cry in the car.  And of course I did but held back because I didn't want to have a mental breakdown in the parking lot of Regal Henrietta.

I think part of what hit so hard is the parallels I saw in my own life and emotions that I thought I held let go of but realized are still there.  I have just covered over them and put up a bitter exterior but I realized last night that I need to get rid of that.  I have to come to terms with fallin gin love with guys that were not emotionally on the same page or could even admit or come to terms with their own sexuality.  I think instead of letting go I buried these feelings.  I do know now that it is better to have loved than not at all.  I want to again but I have been so closed off to the possibility that it could never happen. 

I know it was just a movie but honestly it was done so well, it could be a true story.  I didn't see the actors as themselves but as the characters and when you do that you know it's done well.  The only thing that would have made it better would have been to have openly gay actors play the parts, although for this story I think having supposed straight actors is an advantage.  The again, it is acting so it shouldn't matter as long as they play the parts well and they did amazing.  I only hope everyone could or would see this movie, it simply showed that these two people who happen to be guys loved each other, in a world where they couldn't.  It showed that you can't chose who you fall in love with, you just fall.

I yearn to fall again...

Brokeback Mountain...

amazing.

that's all I can say for now.

going to cry myself to sleep now.